Tag: story

Silence Secrets and Shadows

Published on by AnamikaLeave a comment
Who is she, a question I can’t seem to find an answer to. Well, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t know her. As a matter of fact her and I have been in this silent, very one sided relationship for almost three years now. However, do I truly know her? Her name, home, and birthday remain a mystery to me. Maybe our connection is merely based on the comfort of familiarity and nothing more. There’s pain written all over that little face of hers, but from the looks of it she’s going to take it to the grave with her. All I’ve ever wanted is to take some of her pain and swallow it, just to see her smile. Comfort her I never could, but she stood with me like an anchor when I went through hell and back. She saw me go from a fragile little girl to this thick skinned woman that I am today. All I ask is for her to let me in, just once. As I stand there with my heart aching for her, I feel a drop of tear roll down my cheek. Memories rush through my mind with the speed of light. Then, like a powerful train, it hits me. I finally realize who she is. It is ME. They say mirrors don’t lie, but I am not convinced. These mirrors are deceitful little creatures, and the image that reflects from it is not me, it could never be. Standing in front of these deceitful little creatures I feel all of my hopes dreams and desires gliding down my cheeks. How, when , why ? words that haunt my sleep deprived self. – Resh

The windows

Published on by Anamika2 Comments

It was a lazy evening, I was sitting in my balcony with a cup of tea. I was very bored from sitting and moving inside the house all day. Also I got tired going through the same 4 apps, honestly going down the internet rabbit hole drains you mentally, I mean there’s so much unwanted info on the internet that you consume. I really need an internet detox.

Anyways continuing the balcony incident (just got carried away lol) so opposite to my house there’s this apartment complex, it’s not very close but close enough to see their windows and balconies. (Okay so I am no peeping Tom alright, I love observing)

As I was sipping my tea, I saw two kids (siblings I guess) were aggressively swinging on a rope tied on to the roof of their balcony, to say that they were mischievous would be the least. They were going about it for a solid 10-15 mins, that’s when their mother comes yelling from kitchen and takes them inside the house and slams the door shut. This was quite amusing.

That’s when I realized, every window there had a story. Next to those kid’s balcony I saw a cute couple taking pictures of the sunset and simply enjoying each other’s company. On the other I saw an old grandpa reading something with full concentration(he was really into it), and a grandma appeared from behind him and simply placed the tea cup on his arm rest. No words exchanged, they were so used to each other’s presence I could see it.

Every home has a story, what you see through these windows is just a glimpse of it. Some windows are aesthetically decorated, some are simple and plain, while some are filled with potted plants. All this says something about the people who live within.

Windows are beautiful isn’t it, even though every house in that apartment complex are identical architecturally, each an everyone of them has a unique story. And windows share a glimpse of it.

I miss her so much..

Published on by Anamika2 Comments

I wish she was there with me today, I wish she got to see me grow up, I wish she was her right now, so I could tell her “Grandma I got the job, I am big girl now”

Growing up I had amazing relationship with my grandparents, especially my grandma. She was the sweetest person I knew. My friends who have met her fell in love with her sweet and kind personality.

These days I miss her way too much. Grandma has always been the one I went to for advice on anything and everything. I could talk to her without any fear, it just felt natural telling her all my problems. I miss those days when life was simple, coming back home from school to see mom and Grandma wait for me and I’d rant all that happened throughout the day.

Now that I think about it, I can’t really figure out when did things get so complicated. I mean it seems like yesterday when didn’t wake up in the morning not being anxious about how my day would be. I didn’t have think about consequences of decisions, no no wait I didn’t even have to take decisions ( those good old days)

I loved evenings those days when my grandma sat me down with chai (tea) in her hand and read me stories from books, we spoke about her childhood, school life, life as a mom etc and also helped me with homework. These days I am busy with assignments and test preparations in the evenings, I go to bed early because I have to wake up early for college. (Monotonous routine)

I wish she was here to greet me with her infectious smile when I was having a rough day at college, I wish she was here to see me graduate, get a job, start a life. I wish she was here to guide me. But she’s not

Grandma may not be here today but I am pretty sure her prayers are still protecting me today.

I drank lemon water in a copper glass and it was a disaster!!

Published on by Anamika1 Comment

I am trying to make the best possible use of this quarantine, so I’ve been working out, taking care of my skin & hair and also improving my diet.

I haven’t eaten junk food since March, and I am trying to eat as clean as possible. So I started doing some research online and found out that drinking a glass lemon water in the morning helps to flush out all the toxins. So I decided to give it a try.

The very next day I made myself a glass of lemon water in a copper glass (huge mistake) but before I could drink it my dog was whining so I decided to take him out to pee and poop. I came back maybe after 30 minutes, and drank the lemon water.

I cannot describe in words what followed next, it was scary as hell. My head was spinning, I felt nauseous, my stomach started to hurt, I had to run to the toilet to throw up. All this happened in a span of 1-2 minutes of drinking that water.

I’ve never been so scared in my life, my mom didn’t know what to do either, she was scared too. So I looked it up online, lo and behold what did I find. ‘Any type of citrus juice should not be consumed in a copper utensil, because the citrus acid reacts with copper and it’s dangerous’

Reading this made it even worse, because going to hospital during a pandemic is in itself a scary idea. So I kept drinking water and peeing trying to filter everything out. After 2-3 hours I started feeling better but there was a metallic taste in my mouth which lasted till the end of the day.

Well next day I woke up fine had no tummy issue or any metallic taste in my mouth and I was relieved that it got better.

Well if I had paid attention during chemistry classes in school I would not have to go through this horrendous experience.

Binge watched ‘Storytime’ on YouTube till 4 a.m

Published on by AnamikaLeave a comment

A few nights ago I was binge watching storytimes on YouTube. You know the one were people talk about the crazy shit that has happened to them. I watched stories of crazy neighbors, weird roommates, criminal neighbors ,vengeful ex. You name it I have seen it lol.

Some of them were fake and I knew it, but most of them were legit, because they have live footage of it happening.

My favorite one’s are that of crazy neighbors, seriously after watching those storytimes I am actually grateful for having unproblematic neighbors.

So the story that kept me all night is of a YouTuber Tara Michelle. It wasn’t one video but a series of videos where she’s talking about her crazy neighbor, at first it sounds too absurd to be true. I mean it literally feels like reality tv show type thing. But as I saw more videos with live footage, I was shocked like this is real life.

I find it straight up crazy that people have dealt some weird movie type shit in life and just watching them talk about it feels like I am involved somehow.

What makes these videos so popular is that it creates this emotional connection between the creator and the viewers. While some viewers might relate others are exposed to a new experience. It feels like you are catching up with a long lost friend on her life.

I really miss chatting with my girls after our college hours. We’d simply sit at the canteen eating and just talking things that are going on in our lives. But now due to Corona everyone has pretty much the same routine and nothing new. So these videos distract me from my monotonous routine I guess.

I mean at the end of the day who doesn’t like a little story time.

Starting afresh

Published on by AnamikaLeave a comment

Honestly I started this blog as a personal dairy where I’d share my thoughts, experiences and just life things in general. I’ve always loved reading personal blogs where a person writes about their day, their jobs and such stuff. Some people might find it boring and mundane but I for one love it.

It’s a form of escapism I guess where I am trying to forget my problems.

I suffer from anxiety and I wanted to share my stories here without the fear of being judged, but instead I became even more conscious about my blog posts. I kept on re-reading them again and again just to make sure I don’t make a fool out of myself, tried to make them as perfect as possible finding the perfect picture for the blog and never being satisfied with the title. All this became exhausting and it started to feel like my school assignments which I hated btw.

This is how I have been living my whole life. I take things way too seriously and never actually enjoy anything.

I love to write because I can express my self better in writing than oral communication, but because I was stressing about my posts being perfect, it just sucked the fun out of it. So I started procrastinating in order to avoid it. That made me feel even worse

#Millenniallifecrisis is my inspiration, she’s funny, sarcastic and intelligent. I love to read her posts, it’s so personal and her stories are really entertaining.

I’ve just started blogging I don’t know a lot about it. I want to write about things that make me happy and not force my self to write about certain topics just to get views.

One thing I can tell for sure is that I am going to keep this blog simple and raw. I am going to talk about how I survived my college years with general anxiety and social anxiety. Things I learned about people, friendships and lot more.

Also I am a sucker for good artwork be it movies, books or music videos, so you can expect one or two appreciation posts.

I hope you guys would want to be a part of this journey with me. If yes please do follow me and press that like button, its always nice to get some validation 🙂

Okay so that’s it for now, hope to see you for my next post, byeee ❤

How I met my dog

Published on by AnamikaLeave a comment

Although I’ve always been a dog lover, I have never had one as a pet before. My sister and I would practically beg our parents for a pet dog. Dad was some what inclined to get one, but my mom was not very pleased with the idea. She thought we wouldn’t take care of the dog and ultimately all the responsibilities would fall on her.

I mean we can’t blame mom though, because as kids we were not the responsible type, and she already had too much on her plate.
So we tried to understand and stopped pestering our parents for a dog

Now flashforward to time when a mama dog gave birth to four puppies in our neighborhood, four adorable fur babies. Barring a few most of our neighbors liked dogs,some even fed them and also made them a bed with old blankets.
Very soon most of them got adopted and found forever homes, except for one. Well she was different from the rest of them, she was smaller and was terrified of people unlike her siblings who loved being the center of attraction, maybe that’s why she never got adopted I guess.

We would feed the mama dog and the pup every night. The pup gradually warmed up to us. Well this went on for six months, my sister and I  played with the pup fed her & her mom every night. On one such when we were looking for the mama dog to feed them only the pup came out, the mama was no where to be seen, also I hadn’t seen her all day. Now I was starting to get a little worried but still, I fed the pup and went back home. I thought she’d return late at night to her pup.

The next day again there was no sign of the mama dog and pup was really scared to even come out for food. The pup came closer to me shivering and whining, I think she was calling for her mom, I teared up, I couldn’t see her like this.

Later that evening one of our neighbors told my mom that a dog met with an accident in front of his shop last night and maybe that was this pup’s mother.
I cried myself to sleep that night.

Well the next morning I woke up with a terrible headache and shitty mood. After finishing breakfast I was mindlessly switching channels on TV when my mom came out of the kitchen and she said and I quote “you know what let’s take her in” It took me some time to register what mom said.

Well what followed was that we gave the pup a bath, mom and dad took her to a vet and got her vaccinated and brought her home.

And that’s how I met my dog six years ago. Honestly I think she was destined to be a part of our family.